She who walks at night...

Moved to New Orleans (will have posts up about that at some point). And the Saints just beat the Vikings- so they're going to the Superbowl!

Hearing people cheering and howling outside my window inspired me to step out of my comfort zone and walk the streets at night...alone. I did not go very far, nor did I traverse a dangerous part of town. But that did not change the tone of my experience. Was I raped? Battered? Or harassed? Nope.

No drama. The only violence I experienced was silent and cultural; the subliminal messages that are told to women. "Don't go out at night...and certainly don't go out by yourself". Common sense stuff, right? I feel as though such statements, as well meaning as they are, help to create victims and place the blame upon them. Why should a women need to heed such things? Why should I have to fear such?

While I was out walking, I realized that there really was nothing I could do to defend myself. That thought did not frighten me nearly as much as the thought of me being sneered at for whatever ill might befall me..."She should know better". Why not point fingers at the men who victimize women and make us terrified to wonder out unless we're in herds? Instead we place all the responsibility upon the woman...very little seems to be put upon the persons who commit crimes against someone else's body.

My bestie and lad both concerned about my well being. And even a stranger was too.

A man was walking behind me for several blocks- I did not like the tone of this and slowed down so that he could eventually pass me. We had an interesting dialogue, which I believe puts things into perspective:

White male with cup in his hand: "How're you"
Me: "Hello!"
Man: "You sure are walking far, by yourself"
Me: "Eh" (walking slowly before turning off at my block, to make sure he does not follow)
Man: "You should really be careful" (said more like a threat than a good Samaritan caution)

Men are aware of the social rules regarding women and their proper spacial spheres. Obviously a woman, walking alone, at night, in a city, is looking to be disturbed in some fashion. I was fortunate tonight that nothing happened. Maybe I lacked key features: drunken body language, high heels, cup or beer,revealing clothes, or not good looking enough.

It just does not sit right with me, that I know my being a woman is a constant vulnerability to my health and well-being.